What to Share with Your Wedding Officiant for a Truly Personalized Ceremony - Pre-Interview Checklist
- The Marrying Lady
- Sep 22
- 2 min read
Finding the right wedding officiant isn’t just about asking questions—it’s also about sharing the right information so they can truly get to know you. The more your officiant understands your story, your style, and what matters most to you as a couple, the more authentic and personalized your ceremony will feel. This pre-interview checklist will guide you through what to share—your values, preferences, and vision—so you can be sure your officiant is the right fit and can create a ceremony that reflects who you are.
1. What do you hope for your ceremonies style & tone?
☐ Ceremony Vibe: Formal, casual, traditional, modern, playful, romantic?
☐ Religious or Secular: Will your ceremony be spiritual, cultural, or nontraditional?
☐ Tone Preference: Lighthearted, humorous, emotional, or heartfelt?
(Note: I can meet all of these styles, but identifying your preferences will allow me to draft a personalized ceremony that sets the right tone.)
2. Personal Stories & Values
☐ Your Love Story: Key moments you want highlighted (how you met, memorable trips, funny moments that demonstrate that you make a great team).
☐ Shared Values: Themes to include—family, friendship, adventure, humour, food, pets.
(Note: You can add or remove any of these types of stories from your ceremony draft, but it helps me get to know you.)
3. Vows & Rituals
☐ Vows: Will you write your own, use traditional, or mix both?
☐ Unique Elements: Do you want special rituals, or personalized touches?
☐ Readings & Music: Will you include any special poems, readings, or live music?
(Note: The more I learn about you from answering the first two sections, the better I can assist with ideas to personalize the ceremony for you.)
4. Priorities & Expectations
☐ What is Most Important to You: Personalization, flow, legal accuracy, or entertainment?
☐ Do you have any “must-haves: Elements you absolutely want included.
☐ Do you have any “must-NOT haves: Things that you’ve seen at weddings that give you the ick?
☐ How long or short do you imagine the ceremony to be?
(Note: Draw on past wedding ceremonies you’ve been to and what you took away from them that you’d like for your own celebration.)
5. Communication & Planning
☐ Guidance: Are you comfortable with reading blogs, watching videos, or require more hands-on support?
☐ Pre-Wedding Meetings: Do you wish to have a virtual walkthrough to review all logistics?
☐ Rehearsal Participation: Will you have a wedding coordinator, or a wedding party that will require support?
☐ Handling Unexpected Events: Will there be any unusual family dynamics to be aware of?
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This is a great checklist! It really makes you think about what you actually want for your ceremony. Kinda like a "rice purity test" for your relationship goals, haha. Definitely sharing this with my engaged friends!